By D.Crowley

Syracuse, NY. Homecoming 1998 - Homecoming weekend - about an hour before the Syracuse v. West Virginia football game. Josh, Erin and I finish up our beers at Maggies and head back to the Sheraton to pick up out tickets before the game. I run up to our homebase on the fourth floor - expecting to find Jay and Alex waiting, tickets in hand, ready to leave for the game. So, they're a few minutes late - Amy and a few of her friends (who were sharing the room w/ Jay & Alex) were there instead, so we sat around and talked for a minute.

We're just sitting around joking about things - Faegans the night before, blah blah - when this girl makes a joke about me and I toss a backpack in her direction in jest. Ha ha ha. As we're laughing, someone who had just missed my playful gesture was wondering what just happened so I pick up the bag and tossed the backpack at this girl again in a slow-motion instant-replay type fashion.

This time, however, instead of laughing, this girl jumps to her feet, dashes over to me and clocks me the face! No joke! Instead of the civilized "Ouch, I wish you hadn't playfully tossed that backpack at me" this girl went postal, punching me once, twice, three times and sucker punches me once more in the face - all while she's screaming in hysterics, swearing at me and trying to repeatedly knee me in the crotch.

Mind you, all this is happening in the span of less than ten seconds. At first I thought she was kidding - I mean, hey, we were joking around and I barely even know this girl. I finally realized she was quite serious when the forth punch landed on my face.

So, I grab both her arms, hugging her as hard as I could so she couldn't swing at me. At this point I'm apologizing for whatever-it-was-I-did to make her so crazy, but she didn't want to hear any of it. So this crazy girl, no lonegr able to unleash her wrath on my face, bites my ear (yes, it hurt) and then bites my shoulder - through a thick sweater and t-shirt, breaking skin and leaving a perfect imprint of her teeth in my shoulder (Seinfeld Kramer-style). (See pictures below.)

I finally just shoved the crazy girl away, apologized again (apparently the bag hit her in the eye leaving her "permanently blinded" - yeah whatever - she blinked it off in a second) and I took off. My adrenaline was going strong for a good half hour after that leaving me pretty painless. I finally took a look at the damage done later that night at Faegans, taking great pleasure in retelling the story and pointing the Krazy Girl out to my friends from across the bar.

Of course I later find out from her friends that this isn't the first time she's flipped out for no reason - she's been pretty Krazy for a while, randomly whopping ass on a number of occasions over the years. Oh well, at least it gives me a good story to tell.